Thursday, February 21, 2008

I Got Dicked.

As in Andy Dicked. He had a meeting in the CC office today. I just happened to be filling in the assistant position on the desk of the main contact person, so it's my job to go see to it that everyone gets ushered into the correct meeting room, ask if they'd like anything to drink. Well, the man's 30 minutes late, calls up on his way in the elevator. Turns out, he's got a camera crew with him and wants to mike Gary (m'boss). So I'm thinking...OK, that's fine, we'll see you when you get up here.

So I get the call. Andy Dick is here, finally. So I go out there and BAM. Camera in my face as soon as I walk out the door. I'm totally taken aback by this, because I wasn't expecting a CIRCUS. But there are two cameras, each with their own mini-crew (that's like, 6 people each or some ridiculousness), three people in Andy's entourage, and four people camping out in the hall. So I go over to find out which conference room we're in, Camera goes back to defcon1, holding pattern. But it's LOUD. There are like 12 people in our tiny waiting room. So I'm standing up there, and say..."Um, Hi? Hello people?"

ZOOM. Cameras at defcon5!

So I start herding the cats, Andy's channeling his diva persona (because from what I understand he's a pretty cool guy when there aren't cameras on). Sits down. He wants a water 'room temperature.' This is totally planned. Fat hanger-on wants a diet coke. Cool, I can do this. I slip out a grab a couple of waters and a coke. Fat Hanger-on doesn't want a WARM diet coke. He starts complaining. I'm just vague and say I can look for a cold one (even though I KNOW that we only have a regular cold coke). He asks me if I drink soda warm. I said, of the soda I drink, sure. He looks at me like I'm making this up and asks me what kind of soda I drink. Well, that's obvious. Cheerwine. He's dumbfounded, going...What the heck's cheerwine? Well, for anyone who has ever HAD Cheerwine, cheewine is simply Cheerwine. You either know it or you don't. (If you don't, sucks to be you.) And I wasn't inclined to explain the intricacies of Cheerwine. I simply told him No, it's not 'wine' (We're discussing SODA here buddy) and said I'd look into a cool beverage (after Andy decided he wanted the warm diet coke, go figure.) So I made my escape, signed a release, and let everyone else suffer through the pitch.

Reality TV sucks.

1 comment:

Pauline said...

I believe the term you're looking for is "DEFCON 4" if you're referring to that movie. Or maybe you're referring to the video game, who knows.