Fun with the Daily Commute

LA has been having some unusually heavy traffic these past few days, which draws out the daily commute. What is already an interminable bore becomes all the levels of hell wrapped into one Uber Level called LA TRAFFIC.

Today I got caught behind a bus for the final, painful two miles to my work. And on the back of this bus were the words "We Believe."

This is the most obnoxious, overused, entitled phrase in the English language. What, exactly, do you believe? That elephants are gray? The sky is blue? Fake saltines aren't as good as the name brand?

So I decided to have a little fun and call the number emblazoned on the back of the bus. The following is a transcript of our conversation:

Guy: Hello, [company].
Me: Hi! So, I'm on my daily commute and stuck behind one of your busses. I was wondering if you could answer a question for me.
Guy: Uh, sure.
Me: Great! So on the back of the bus it says, "We Believe." I'm just curious about what you beilieve in, because I find that an odd thing to put on the back of a bus.
Guy: Oh, it's the owners.
Me: You believe in the owners? Well, I guess that's a good thing...
Guy: (trying not to laugh) No, the Owners believe.
Me: Well, I got that, I'm just trying to figure out what--aside from the mass transit of large groups of people via bus.
Guy: A higher power.
Me: Oh. That's...an odd thing to put on the back of a bus with no context.
Guy: (giving up and laughing) I suppose so.
Me: Alright, well thanks for making my commute a little more interesting!
Guy: (trying to breathe) You're welcome!

Glad I could make this guy's day a little brighter, and it made at least five minutes of my drive to work worthwhile.